It was supposed to be my year of health, my year of getting back on track. By this time of the year, I was to be significantly fitter and slimmer.
I didn’t foresee the crazy rollercoaster ride that had other plans for me.
It all started in the second week of the new year, a phone call I received at work that I will never forget. It was my sister preparing me for the news that my father had been in a serious accident. I remember very clearly how my mind went into overdrive, catastrophising, unsure of what to expect.
Once the initial shock had subsided, I, along with my brother and sister, stepped into caretaker mode. I was at the hospital before and after work, catching doctors on their rounds and ensuring everything was understood and clear for my parents.
I think as the eldest there is a self-imposed expectation on oneself to take care of everything and everyone. It was an incredibly tiring and concerning time and after a few months when dad came home there were trips to rehab and check-ups. It was a time where I stepped up to the uncertainty and met it face to face finding solutions and work arounds and looking after the ones I would normally turn to in uncertain times.
As life began to return to some sort of normality, my Husbands dad, passed away after a lengthy illness. I find the loss of a loved one forces you to evaluate life and coupled with the previous adversity, this is what I found myself doing.
In April, I found my health coach Camille and we worked together on a strategy to move forward with my health. It had been my mission from the beginning of the year to improve my weight and fitness. Finally, I was feeling like I was beginning to focus on me, to date, I’ve lost about 10kg, I wanted it to be much more than that by now. Camille was the understanding and non-judgemental ear that reminded me that the small steps I was making were a step in the right direction. When I achieved my goals like regularly practicing my yoga and eating healthy, she has been full of encouragement and when things haven’t gone so well she has been full of support and understanding. I look forward to our conversations to update her on my progresses or downfalls.
In May I became redundant, it was an incredibly stressful experience and ever the optimist, I was still trying to be there for my parents and now needing to find my way through the forest of uncertainty, honestly, it was a real challenge. As difficult as this time was it was a great gift. An opportunity to stretch outside of my comfort zone and grow. I have built networks, studied, had amazing opportunity and learned in ways I would otherwise not have.
What I learned from all of this was the biggest gift of all.
I am most grateful for those closest to me. For the incredible people who have mentored and provided guidance and the new people who have come into my life. For the lessons, challenges and experiences that have come my way.
All of this has helped me to grow, to open up to new experiences and opportunities. My mentor said to me in May that how I saw things then would be different to how I see them down the track and they were right and I am grateful for that advise as it reminds me not to be too rigid in my focus, but to allow for new paths and experiences as I travel down this road. It also gives me a sense of courage to take a road less travelled.
This year has reaffirmed for me that things don’t always go to plan and this is ok, there is a lot to learn when things don’t go the way we plan.
2019 will be my year of light – my opportunity to shine my light, to grow further and to help others and I am ready……….
Wishing you well